-Monday, October 01, 2007
Childhood Revisited, 2
Note: You'll have to read the previous one first before reading this.
We were then thrown into bed and made to shut up and make no more noise. One time my sister couldn't stop crying, my Aunt Sylvia came and put her out of the house till she stopped. She was only 3-4 years old. That was the discipline you would expect in there. It was no-nonsense, but we didn't suffer at all. Just that when it came to disciplining, everyone in the family was in the business.
One day, I was doing the normal routine, go to school and what not. As usual, I hung out at the school gate, waiting for my grandma to come pick me up. Who knew, after every kid left, I was the only one there. Man. That feeling sucked. I thought she was not coming no more. Or so I thought.
"Damnit." I must have thought to myself at that time.
"I'm going home alone." I didn't care much, since I knew how to get home myself since 4, from the kindergarten, that is. It was fairly simple. Getting through the HDB blocks, crossing a little road. By the time I got home, my granddad was there.
"Where's your grandma?" He asked. I saw my older cousin at home, but not the other 2.
"I don't know..." I replied, but I guess he didn't hear it.
I went on to wash up. As I was picking up my towel, I heard a familiar voice shouting for my name along the corridor, up the stairway. It came closer. Till it was at the door, I recognised it. It was grandma. Along with her were those 2, Ah Mei and Ah Siang. They looked at me with innocent eyes. She was infuriated as she went all over just to look for me. I was given a good cleaning of my ears with her scolding. I found out later that my grandma had to attend to something else important so she was late.
I was screwed by my grandma. That sucked.
When I grew a little older like when I was 5, I'd always go for a game of void-deck soccer with Ah B. He was 6. We always hung out with kids of other races, usually Malay kids. Chinese kids usually hung out at the playgrounds, but whatever. I had a good time. That's where I picked up my basic conversational Malay, up till today. We were getting athletic.
We represented our classes in the inter-kindergarten games. (If you recall, yours might have had one too.) We brought back plenty of trophies. Till today, it's still shelved in the glass cabinet in my grandma's.
Once during my birthday, my grandma bought me this decent set of clothing. I was kinda crazy at that time and I made a big fuss. I wanted the power ranger set. I made my grandma buy it for me, regardless of that shirt and shorts set she got for me. I was fucked up man. I didn't care how she felt at that time. Man, I really was an ass at that time. After everything she'd done for me, I treat her like that.
Till today I regret doing that to her. She's gone already. I was only 8 when she was gone.
Fast forward till I was in primary school. We'd come home with homework, and she'd make sure we finish it. It was, finish it or eat the
rotan. The cane. The thing that kids feared and found ways to hide it from their parents, or grandparents. This tough nut discipline got me first in class for every test throughout from primary 1-2.
One day she came home complaining of headache. She went to the hospital for a health screening. Bad news. Her bone marrow couldn't produce more white blood cells. I don't know what was it called exactly, but at that age of 8, I knew that if no bone marrow was to be transplanted into her body, she'd be gone.
I went to visit. It was a friday. I bought her some
pau. With my parents and my report card which read 288/300 for my mid-years. She was looking great. We talked a little, and I had to go home.
Who knew, things unfolded in just a short time. The next day, the hospital called early in the morning and said she fell into a coma. It was an unexpected piece of news. The whole family of 7 siblings went down to the hospital. It was 5-6am in the morning. We were waiting for news. The doctors told us to brace ourselves. They said that grandma had clots in her brain.
I cried. Tears flowed freely. When it was my turn, I went into the Intensive Care Unit to see how she was doing. I could no longer control myself. "
AH MA, wake up! I have school next week! You gotta wake up to bring me to school! Sob... sob..." The nurse got hold of me and held me back. I settled down, and went home.
My parents stayed for that day. The next day while I was back at home with my sister and my paternal grandma, my parents called. I was told to give the line to my paternal grandma. They exchanged a few words, and then I was told that my maternal grandma had not much longer to live. She was in a critical condition.
At 8 years old, I flagged a cab, and told the driver to get to SGH asap. When I reached, everyone was there. I held my grandma's hand. I cried. I didn't know what to say. She was still hanging in there when I was there. I went home. She was gone by that time.
Now I'm all grown up, I still miss her sometimes, especially when I go to Bedok, take that bus service which goes to my grandma's. That field I used to run in with my cousins, Ah B, Ah Siang and my sister Ah Mei, was gone. It turned into newer HDB blocks. The kindergarten's still there, it was upgraded. My little green pillow is still there too...
I know why some people want to remain as kids. The carefree feeling, being ignorant and all... It was great.
But then, I had so much to tell my grandma. She left before I could say sorry and thank you. Sorry for being such a brat to make you buy something I wanted though you got me something else, sorry for being a pain when you had to look for me all over the place when I went home alone. Thank you for taking care of me ever since I was with a little boy till I was 8 cos my parents were busy at work, along with Natalie, Andreas, Oliver, Ah B, Ah Siang, me and Ah Mei. Thanks for being such a wonderful grandma who never failed us.
Its almost 10 years now. It was 1998.
I <3 you grandma, cousins, and my childhood. I'm growing up now, I'm doing fine.
Yeechien Wrote;
10:42 PM
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