-Tuesday, August 28, 2007
Zoom, zoom, the end.
Just like anyone else who'd have asked, why do we only have 24 hours in a day. It seems goddamn short right now. Like how another dude would say, "So much to do, so little time."
School's as usual, its just another routine for this 2 years. At the end, I'll just pick up that piece of document and go. My life's kinda black and white, there's nothing interesting to speak about. 'Going out' seems like a word so distant. When was the last time I went out and had a good time. I don't remember when.
I'm just me. I'm authentic. I don't try too hard to be someone I'm not. T-shirt and shorts are for me. Swap it for shirt and trousers for more formal events. I'd prefer to stay in a little group of 4 or 5 rather than hanging out with a whole clique. I don't need no wax, no gel no whatever styling shit. I believe in simplicity. Saves me the hassle.
Tell me about appearance, and whatever. Simplicity is the way to go. Screw whatever appearances are latest.
What's latest? Latest is moving. Man, who's keeping up. Its just another headless chicken race.
Now, where did I put the lighter?
Yeechien Wrote;
8:41 PM
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Gone.
Thanks for the help when I needed it. Needless to say, the trust in me has gone. Considering I took so much time and still taking time to respond to it.
I've thought of the consequence. Maybe all I do is just think. I need to put more thoughts into action, instead of letting the thoughts collect.
I've only myself to blame for all this. I learnt lessons the HARD way.
After so much I thought you wouldn't even give a damn about me, after me delaying it for so long. I thought you'd be mad at me, you'd be so damn disappointed. I thought, how am I going to face it. Initially I know I didn't have the guts to do it. But I did it anyway.
It felt awkward trying to explain my situation, when I was the problem. I should have spared more thought for others.
I need assurance. After so much, I'm not sure if I am even confident of myself. I should be. I'll try.
I thought of a lot of things, I thought of whats gonna happen next, and I was wrong.
And so I thought, too much.
Apologies die out with time. There's no point saying it repeatedly, I got it.
Thank you for showing me what true friendship is, embracable, rational and more. After all the unjust I felt I did, you still spoke to me in a nice, rational way. Thanks for the trust in me that I will live by my principles. I certainly will.
I guess there's nothing much left to say regarding this.
Yeechien Wrote;
1:48 AM
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-Wednesday, August 22, 2007
Argh.
Time shapes relationships. Life's not the same anymore.
Life is a dogfight. I eat you, you eat me. We all wanna make it to the top. We want the best only for ourselves, at any expense. What about others? Have we ever spared a thought for them? Hell no. They got nothing to do with us. We just gotta do our job, and we're gone like the wind.
I need to catch up with y'all man. Where are you people? How are you guys doing? Tell me, I'd really wanna know. I don't wanna speak in the past tense. I don't wanna say whatever we've done, the times we had chats, had outings. Whats this, "Post sixteen-year-old trauma" ? Those chicken wings, sugarcane drinks, stingrays, kangkong, seafood, carrot cake. Most importantly, the conversations exchanged over the tabletop.
Everyone has their own cliques of friends. I spell "loner". I don't have great cliques to boast about, but I got a few great acquaintances. I hope we will still carry on man. I know we will.
More and more work coming in.
You gotta put up with the rain if you wanna see the rainbow.
Great relationships endure long distances.
Yeechien Wrote;
11:23 PM
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-Friday, August 10, 2007
I need inspiration
Everytime I set out to type something I end up deleting it. I need inspiration to write.
Hocus-pocus.
No effect.
Till I get inspiration then. It's hard to put thoughts into words, you know.
Yeechien Wrote;
11:35 AM
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-Wednesday, August 01, 2007
I was on a 10 week hiatus.
10 weeks gone just like that. In between were a series of events. Time files eh.
I wonder how's everyone doing. Every morning I pass by my alma mater, I take a peek at what's going on, remembering that everyday for the past 4 years I was right inside. When I was there, I wanted to get outta there as soon as possible. Now I'm gone, I miss the times there. Now I know why they say how we take things for granted until we realise its gone. Just random thoughts though.
Just last week, I ended my job of co-operating with Mindef Scholarship Center to organise a National Defence-related Seminar. It has provided me with new insights on what the defence forces are doing. The scholarships seem appealing too.
I need to work hard.
Why are people telling me its difficult just because I am in some random neighbourhood school? Is it really impossible? I know the odds have been like that for time to come, but there's a possibility, right?
I need to work even harder.
Considering the grades I got for mid-years, I have to be more consistent, disciplined, focused to get what I want.
What a rough patch in my life.
Leadership Training Camp 2007, a first with my College. Was kinda a learning point.
I learnt that being sincere and real is the way to go. Out with the acts, the "I am always correct" way of working with others. Don't deny compliments, feedback, and anything else. Something someone else says might be something for you to improve on. We have to 'upgrade' ourselves using the feedbacks provided.
On my friendships. Where is everyone? Is everyone doing fine? I'm quite okay, but I kinda miss you all. (It's the first time I actually miss people.) Also the experiences we had together. Do you people still remember? We need to meet one day to catch up. It's been half a year... Haven't heard much from you all. I wanna hear more.
As I continue to get more control of myself, buh-bye.
Yeechien Wrote;
8:28 PM
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