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yeechien
18.
Frank, outspoken.
That's probably my traits.
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-Wednesday, November 15, 2006

Back to blogging.


Mm. Im back.

Anyway's there's still like 3 papers up tomorrow. Time flies. Tomorrow also marks my end of Secondary School. Oh how significant it is -.- Well so far the exams were kinda do-able. Was it, or not?

Going to be busy with the Prom Night for the next 2 weeks. Meetings in and out, and more.

Oh no more school also means no more stories to hear, no more bitchings to be involved in and anything bad. On the whole secondary school was kinda okay. Made a few friends, some good juniors and a little bit more. It was fruitful. Next up would be the Prom Night.

What I anticipate: Fashionistas? Superstars? Lol. Something like that. Everyone would come all dressed up, and maybe to kill. To kill maybe due to some other reasons.

Society is full of critics, but that's what makes us improve. Someone sees something you don't, but it don't sound nice so you choose not to listen. If you listen you might be able to improve. So many events unfolding for everyone.

Life's like so aimless now, oh man.


Yeechien Wrote;
5:27 PM
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-Sunday, November 12, 2006

The End Lies Around The Corner.


4 more days. Just 4 More.


Yeechien Wrote;
10:52 PM
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-Monday, November 06, 2006

The Prom Story.


Realised I haven't been blogging for a fortnight, or almost there.

Finally the O levels are like here already. It wasn't that tough as I expected it to be, who knows? Well. I'll see as the days pass.

Really, this last stretch wasn't easy. So many things to do. My head almost like a 100-pound weight waiting to slam into my glass table. So tired, panting, and panting. It's rather a fact, I have no life, at least until the O levels end then it's going to be better. Then its going to be the running of the Prom. Hmm. I shall talk about my life this year. A little bit.

Feburary. Just like another day. I don't know why the hell this Prom idea struck my mind. I think its cause, I dont know? Shit I can't rembmer. I told a few friends(Jacky the badminton guy, Laura the tracker, Faheem the lembek MSG, and a few others?) about it, and not long after, I was on my way to the General Office to make an appoinment with Miss Ng. That was where I bumped into Xinmin , the volleyball captain. She agreed to be a co-worker, and we'd be meeting Miss Ng in no time to come. Okay, so that was it. Me and the first committee member, Xinmin. I was quite naive then, ignorant to the obstacles that I was about to face. I thought that everything went smoothly. I was wrong. I'll get to that part later.

Countless meetings with our OBS instructor, Belinda on how to write a proposal, and listening to her on her experiences was very insightful. That was March. And then I got my commitee members: Me the Chairman, Xinmin the Vice-Chairman, Laura the PR/Publicity, Jacky the Logistics/Events Manager, Tammie the Events Manager. Well, the presentation by me and Xinmin at Tampines Mart's Mcdonalds seemed to go down well with Miss Ng. A sigh of relief. Then it was down to work. Survey forms were printed and the results were encouraging. A whopping number of 81% said yes. And yeah, I was too naive to believe that it would stay around the same for the actual attendance. Okay. Then was the Mid-Years, so we halted for awhile, but all the time I'll have to thank Xinmin for pioneering this event with me, who'd be willing to spend her weekends doing work for the cohort? That was also when, I realised I had a really good buddy. I hardly have buddies of the opposite gender. It's not like so easy for another individual to share the same feelings as you, the countless topics to discuss till late, and all.

Then was study time, the study meetings organised, and yeah. After the Mid-Years we were like back into work mode, with Xinmin coming to my place almost every weekend to do the Prom till late evenings. Its like 12pm-6/7pm kind. It wasn't easy doing those work, those paperwork and such. The meetings at Orchard Hotel, and the countless questions we asked while doing this and that. It wasnt like, oh I want a Prom, then it'll drop from the sky.

The June Holidays. More weekend work and sometimes weekdays too.

I remembered we requested for $800 from the school to help us out a little bit. Then we submitted the proposal which included other info of course. Then we waited and waited, what would the results be? I didn't know. In the end, the School replied. They were going to give us $1500. On top of that, they would be providing equipment like laptops and projectors for us too. How nice. That was the first time I tasted the sweetness of success. Then came another surprise. The VL coach, Coach Joshua Luke, heard of our event and he decided to step in to help. I must say, I am very grateful that I met such a nice person, seriously. He came in. Plans were made, and 1 month later, we were engaged in discussion for the layout of the Prom. Also, we switched from Orchard Hotel to Raffles Town Club.

Okay then after that was kinda major for me. Everyone seemed to be missing. Soon I felt that I was like walking that long stretch of road alone. Which sucked. I tried doing my job, but who knew, I got shot countlessly. Shot as in mentally. So many times, so many experiences. I knew people didn't mean it, but those wounds still hurt till this day. Call me weak, you're wrong. The logic is that, when you drive a nail into a piece of plywood, the hole will be there even after you pull it out. This project is my pride, and I have established a bond with it. I found my buddy drifting away, due to some reasons. Maybe it was me. I think, all the time it was me. I was too lenient a person and I took it too hard on me, and made life better for everone. I'm trying to forget and be a better person. People are starting to trample on me, over and over not realising it.

Then was the fundraising. It was largely a success in terms of money, but I felt that it was kinda sloppy. Well then, good work anyway. Last minute work, my lectures didn't seem to go down well.

I realised. I was alone. Was I? I felt alone, at least. Really, when they say lonliness is like the chill of winter, it is. Looks like I had to take the weight. Sometimes its not I don't like to let people take over, its not that. Seeing others in such a plight, I couldn't help but to take matters into my own hands. Mistake. Soon I found myself working like a dog from day to night. It was study, prom, study, prom. And the cycle went on for quite some time. I admit. I was on the verge on breaking down. And I did. The fact that I'm able to narrate this to you, shows that I have proven myself worthy of this calling for the 200+ people I am accountable for.

I don't know. I was thinking and thinking and thinking. I kept thinking. My head was going to be full. So many things to consider and such. Things became better. The pageant planning and running was a success. That was one thing I was very proud of. Also, there was the band auditions. Thank you Jacky and Tammie for making this possible. Thank you, Your Highness Laura(inside joke) for being my mentor sometimes and being there for me when I needed help. In fact, I have to thank all 4 of my committee members who have been there for me in one way or another. I think 4 of you are the bestest/closest people I have ever interacted with. Thank you for playing a part in my Secondary School life, and giving me something to remember. We'll keep in contact.

For my buddy,
All this while, I felt that, I was too hard on my buddy, Xinmin. Too hard. I felt that I didn't give her space to breathe. Sometimes I made it too difficult for her to make a decision. I don't know, but somehow I feel I don't feel that 'presence' she always gave me. To me, where was she. Yes, my buddy was kinda there sometimes, but somehow it felt really different. I/We (the comm) felt that she was like drifting farther and farther apart. Sometimes you tell me to go hard on you, I wouldn't bear to. Really. Even it was the other comm members, I wouldn't have the heart to be such an idiot to disrupt your routines. Well. Soon there was a small argument, which was settled over the weekend. I was wrong, I doubted my buddy when she never lost her trust in me. I'm sorry. Sometimes it's so overwhelming that I lost my feelings and start to think otherwise. Just to let you know if you're like reading this, there are people out there who really are concerned for you. You know what you want in life, you have alot going on in you, dont lose that direction, really. Only recently there was another wave by other people questioning my decisions. That really woke me up and I said to myself, 'Hey yeechien, are you too much?' Tears welled, and I started to talk to my other comm members and ask them how did they feel about this. I hardly pour out you know. I started to relflect on how I treated the rest of the comm members. Hey bud, seriously I'm really sorry if I like doubted you. Its just me being paranoid. I hope you know what I've been going through, and what the rest are going through. One last thing, I hope that you'd be that jovial and cheerful you that you used to be soon, I think youre facing too much stress from everywhere else. Remember to pour out when you can, and people really care for you out there.

Yeechien.


Yeechien Wrote;
8:43 PM
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